My 2nd rotary speech

Just a brief update! 

I delivered my second deaf awareness public speech with a lovely lady from Action on Hearing Loss. We pretty much spoke about the charity's amazing work and then I added my own personal touch and spoke about my personal experiences! I was so overwhelmed afterwards by the positive feedback! 

So many people approached me just to tell me how "fantastic" and "inspirational" I am. I'm beaming right now! 

There was an opportunity to ask questions afterwards which was great, this soon turned into a discussion about hearing loss. It was brilliant! The audience were so interested and asking plenty of questions. We also received a cheque donation and also some cash donations... RESULT! 

On another note, next week I will be heading to London to collect an award for my passion and dedication for raising awareness. Even better eh?! 

I'm determined to keep going and continue to raise awareness, perhaps in schools next time? We will see what the future brings.... 

Top of the world right now!

The lifeguard.

 It's easy to feel depressed when I think about how deaf I am. My thoughts and anxieties take over and drown me each time. I feel worthless and stuck. 

It's important that I do something about it to stop myself from drowning. I can't do anything about my thoughts. The more I  try not to think about something, the more I think about it. 

Meeting my boyfriend 'S' (who happens to be a lifeguard!) has helped me and stopped them drowning thoughts. Every time I see him, the drowning thoughts stop, my anxieties fade. I have everything I need in front of me. He makes me smile, he makes me laugh and even makes my tinnitus stop (or at least, less noticeable). 'S' is my 'tinnitus eraser'. I honestly don't know what I would do without his support these past couple of weeks. He's truly amazing. Unique. Nothing could compare to him. 

So as it happens, a lifeguard saved me from drowning. 

It doesn't mean my negative thoughts have magically gone away, but he has still saved me. Knowing I have his support has made me feel better about myself. 

It's amazing how someone can mean so much to you in such a short period of time. I truly feel like the luckiest/proudest  girl in the world.

Deaf girl dating hearing guy

People have been asking for updates, so I thought I would just write a brief update of how things are progressing.
I would like to think that things are going quite well!
All of that fuss and worry over nothing, eh!
I feel quite happy at the moment, obviously, I know you do during the early stages when everything feels new.

Date 2 was a good one, went bowling. I was anxious about hearing above the noise (pins being bowled over and people talking), but I couldn't really fault the date. Almost perfect!
There was a pub area inside the bowling alley, so we went in there and I just about managed. I felt extremely relaxed which was a good thing because it brings out my true personality (bubbly, jokey etc.).

Date 3 was also near perfect, date 4 will be on Sunday and very relaxed... arcades!
It is nice to date a guy who is laid back for a change. We both agreed a posh meal is too serious and boring, also very pressurising! I remember my first ever date with this guy 2 or 3 years ago, and we went to Frankie and Benny's and it was SO noisy and the whole thing was serious! I remember having a nice time, although I didn't feel myself because I was out of my comfort zone... the NOISE! Jesus!

I'm not a high maintenance person, I don't like all them posh dates when a guy has to spend £50 on me, its ridiculous! I just love to spend time with a guy who makes me happy. It doesn't matter where you are, as long as you are with the person who you want to spend time with, who also makes you laugh.
My hearing has made me this way. I would easily choose a night in over a full on night out!

So, yeah! I'm not going into detail because I don't want to jinx things with this guy. But things are going well so far.
It goes to show, having a hearing loss shouldn't affect things. Only the truly lovely people see past it.
Luckily for me, I have a really nice guy who can see past it all, regardless of the frustration.

Deaf girl dating

Well, I'm not one to kiss and tell so I'll keep it short. As some of you may know, I'm back on the dating scene and went on my first date in 3 years! - I know, jeez! So it's safe to say, I was absolutely crapping myself. It wasn't the normal things like "what do I wear?" And "what do I say?". But instead it was "how is he going to react about the fact that I am dependant on hearing aids?"

Well, he didn't care at all! He just questioned why would he care? 

So, all that worry for nothing! Eh?

Dating and deafness is a taboo subject in my eyes, so I wanted everyone to see, we have feelings too! We're the same as any ordinary person! Obviously to date a deaf person/Hearing impaired you need to have a lot of patience and understanding which is what I told this guy yesterday. Obviously I was worried because he has a very outgoing lifestyle and I was dreading the thought of keeping up with that when I can't hear half the time! (Noisy pubs etc) We'll see what happens with that....

ANYWAY, it is important that you are not ashamed and you are upfront and honest. The first date location is extremely important because that's where you judge with first impressions. In my case, I chose a quiet pub and we sat outside where there was no one about... Except the occasional DRILL... But I won't go into how annoying that was!

When you tell a girl or guy that you are deaf, if you are worried about how they will react or worried it will make things awkward.. Don't be! I laughed it off by saying "I don't have the hearing of a dog ... But I'm quite a cool person!" And "I'm not staring at your lips lovingly, just lip reading!" That is the best way to approach things!! And what happened? I felt so much better and he joked back.

So my tip for today: never be ashamed and just be yourself... You'd be surprised most of the time they're ok with it! :-) 

Back on the dating scene...

So, as it goes.. I have a 'kind of date' tomorrow. It's safe to say, I'm actually really nervous! It's been 3 years I think since I've done this. I am hoping that I've chosen a quiet enough place to go (pub) I've been there before on a Wednesday lunch time and it was DEAD... Perfect! So I'm hoping it will be dead tomorrow so I can hear! 

The reason why I've called it a 'kind of date' is because this guy wants to get to know me and see what I'm like and make some judgements about me and decide whether I'm good enough for him! This makes me hugely nervous because I've also got to tell him about my deafness. I'm actually really worried about how he is going to react! At the moment im thinking of all of the worst case scenarios such as: "what if I don't hear him?!". I'm not worried about normal things such as what to talk about and what to wear! All I'm worried about is hearing the damn guy! 

Can anyone relate or offer me some tips?! I'm a bit rusty!

Accessibility To Public Services

I was just having a moment of thinking and this wonderful thought popping into my head.
Wouldn't it be lovely if society was inclusive? 
Sadly, this will never be the case as not all people in society are willing to be inclusive (my opinion) and lack of awareness in general.
I am very passionate about raising awareness because I want to educate society of the effects of hearing loss. I want them to realise how this negatively impacts on someone like myself if society was not inclusive or supportive and welcoming to their services etc.

One thing that has played on my mind lately is the accessibility to cinema services (subtitled). I have visited my local cinema in town and I asked the nice lady at the desk whether the cinema had viewings for subtitled films.
They didn't.
This was after I approached my local Cineworld about subtitled films and was let down by them. It is such a shame because I absolutely love going to the Cinema and watching all the new releases, such as 'Fifty Shades of Grey 'or 'Run All Night' which are new films that I wanted to see. I was told by Cineworld to check back on the website on Thursday as they told me that they may add some subtitle screenings. It is now Friday and I checked back once again and to my horror, only TWO films were subtitled! (I ticked 'Subtitled' in the screening type list on the right hand side).

I don't usually complain about these sort of things and I would usually wait until the DVD releases. But since I have grown up and am aware of the work of Action On Hearing Loss and their campaigns and constant educating, it has made me aware of my rights.
I shouldn't have to 'wait until the DVD releases'. I don't know much about the law and my rights, but one thing I am aware of is that public services need to make 'reasonable adjustments' for people like myself with a disability, otherwise it is classed as discrimination.

I am not saying that the cinema is 'discriminating', (although they are tilting in that direction)  I just think they need a kick up the bum! They know what they need to do, I just feel that they cannot be bothered sometimes. This reflects on most organisations, they know what they need to do to make services inclusive, I just feel sometimes they just 'cannot be bothered' because it means 'extra work load' etc. I have come across this MANY times in my life, high school, University etc.

I intend to fight for my rights, even if that annoys people, it is part of raising awareness. Not everyone is going to be happy about my constant reminding and educating. I feel that I am missing out on a lot and rather than most people expecting me to sit down and be quiet and just 'accept it'.
No, I will NOT do that. I have just as much of a right as everyone else to live my life to the fullest and I damn well will! I have just as much of a right to access services such as cinemas like any other Tom, Dick and Harry in this world.

Public services/organisations  need to make that effort to go the extra mile to be considered 'Inclusive'. Just because you have added in a few ramps here and there, does not mean you are Inclusive. I approached a member of staff last year in my local Cineworld and asked her whether she could tell me any information about accessibility for the hearing impaired. She did not have a clue at all, she said something about providing me with headphones and I must say, this really did humour me! I went into the cinema screening room and thought to myself "Oh well! I will just have to make use of the loop system"... Can you imagine what happened next?
Yep. There was no loop system. I don't know if they were just simply not switched on, or if there was a loop system at all?

I have stopped going to the cinema now, after 5 or 6 visits and no loop system, I decided that I would not bother. That might be one less problem for Cineworld and all the other cinema's in my area. But I feel that I needed to write about this and make people aware. It is part of my 'Goldy Deaf Awareness' campaign to raise awareness. I promised from the beginning that I would speak in complete honesty.

So, back to my original thought, wouldn't it be lovely if society was Inclusive!

Deaf Storyline in Waterloo Road (aired 2012)

So, I have heard a few weeks ago that the TV drama Waterloo Road is coming to an end soon. I was just thinking about all of the storylines over the years and how much I've enjoyed them. But I am not going to be speaking about all of my favourite episodes in this post... it wouldn't seem relevant and might sound a tad BORING!

One of the storylines that I really enjoyed was aired back in 2012 (I think!) It was about a character called Imogen who us viewers soon found out was actually deaf. Back then when the storyline was aired I was very negative about my hearing and at that point I did not tell anyone about my deafness. It was actually this story line that was the turning point in my life. It was the first storyline that I have heard about, which featured a young person with a deafness like myself. I remember watching the TV and I couldn't believe what I was seeing!

It wasn't until the next day at school me and my friends were talking about it and we all couldn't believe it! (They knew about my hearing loss). It was also nice to know that lots of people in my school year also watched Waterloo Road, even the nasty people who took the mick. It made me feel a sense of normality.

Every week when Waterloo Road came on, I was so excited to see how the storyline developed. It was nice to see that her relationship with her new boyfriend blossomed since she told him.

It was a couple of years ago when this was aired and I know it is 3 years on, but I have come a long way since this storyline aired.
I did actually message the BBC a couple of years ago about this story line and wrote them a heartfelt message, but I never received a response. I hope they are aware of how much of a positive impact they have had on my self esteem and my life so far!

I know this post may sound ridiculous and yes, I am aware that Waterloo Road is just a school TV drama. It was just nice to see something that I could relate to, especially as a young girl in high school (at the time).

If you're curious and want to see the scene when the character 'comes out' about her deafness, click on the link below!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwtF1qOiQRQ